Bloggaday 305 – Commencement Ceremony Tickets pt 1
By David “Two Hour Vocabulary” Dysart
So, over finals week (December 6-10) I received a class-wide email from a student in my Cognitive Psychology class at California State University, San Bernardino. It went something* like this
I was wondering if you had extra tickets for the commencement ceremony.
Apparently, the commencement ceremony is what Cal State calls their graduation. Well, this started a conversation with another Cognitive Psych student I was with at the time. Throughout the quarter, I’ve gotten tons of these class-wide emails from other students in class, usually asking for notes.
Now, I type my notes in class, so I have no problems sending a copy off to anybody who needs them. The student I was with at the time said that she only responds to student emails if it’s not class-wide. Then again, she doesn’t type her notes, so I can’t really blame on those requests.
Well, yada yada yada, I decided to send the ticket requester a ridiculous email reply… Hey, why don’t I share that with you.
I am deeply saddened to inform you of this. You may want to sit for what I'm about to tell you. It could be more than a little bit devastating.
You must understand that I'm not used to giving bad news such as this, so this will be hard on me. Surely, harder on you, but perhaps knowing how hard this is for me will mitigate some of the upcoming grief.
I suppose i should just come out and say it. I do NOT have any extra tickets for our commencement ceremony. I'm sorry that I had to be so blunt, but I figured that that would be better than dragging out the bad news with some long-winded explanation or trying to cushion the blow with some sugarcoated version that would meet good and proper sensibilities.
Now, I know this is hard news to hear. I'm sure that me, random student number 43 from your cognitive psychology class was probably your last hope to score some extra tickets to the commencement ceremony. It really hurts me deeply that I wasn't able to come through for you on this matter. I hope you know that.
I'm sorry. I needed a moment to collect myself.
In these times of economic and moral uncertainty, I know we have to be able to count on one another. Students have so few people they can really count on nowadays. Unfortunately, there are few knights in shining armor left. I know you thought that I would be yours, and with every fiber of my being, I wish I could have been, but to the chagrin of both us, I have failed.
I'm not even sure why you need these extra tickets or how many you need. I hope you understand that despite my ignorance on the subject, my heart truly goes out to you on the matter. I hope this softens the bitter disappointment that you are feeling right now.
But wait! There’s more to this email. I had to cut it short due to the word count. Come back tomorrow
Ridiculous email is ridiculous, only on Bloggaday
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305 December 16
* Actually, it went exactly like that.
Close the screen, the awesome’s getting out