Saturday, June 12, 2010

Bloggaday 118 – My Guide to Efficiency Management and Boredom

Bloggaday 118 – My Guide to Efficiency Management and Boredom

I find the folks who go all wallcrawler when they get stuck at home kind of funny. Apparently, both of my folks are like that. My mom took the week off with furloughs and to take her mom on a Mother’s Day thing. Yesterday, she had one of those days. She rearranged the furniture in the living room and throughout the day, she did that half-napping thing where you don’t really go to sleep, but you just kind of go in and out.
My dad is even worse. He’s always at work. Even on his days off, he’ll go into work on his own time to do stuff that needs to be done. He actually stayed home a couple of days the last week or two, and it drove him nuts. He would wander the hallways, cries of boredom echoing throughout the house.
These are examples of people who haven’t honed their home-staying skills. Mine on the other hand? They have been forged in the jaded heat of boredom.
Now I’m laying some major insight on you here. Don’t go misusing it or selling it. I actually increase stimuli and reduce productivity. It’s actually rather simple. I watch and listen to exorbitant amounts of TV, music, and other forms of audio media. The thing is though, I don’t like to just watch TV. I won’t just veg out on the couch. I’ll start writing or busying myself with some other activities.
The beauty of this plan is the fact that the productivity of the secondary activity (such as the writing of this Bloggaday) is reduced to about 30% of normal. This means that I never really get anything done, but I’ve always got something to do. So I’m always doing something. Sometimes though, the number of even decent shows on TV goes down, or I manage to increase my efficiency somehow. I’ll let you know now, this will happen to you and, then you’re left without enough to do. If efficiency tips above 50%, than you have to pull out the big guns. To deal with that, here’s what you’ve got to do: start writing a blog a day, every day.
If that doesn’t stonewall your free time then yours is a case that not even I can fix. May god have mercy on your soul… as he plays paddleball with it. Come on, how board does he have to be? Have you seen what happened last time his efficiency went up, and the Egyptians fell? . Yeah, that’s how we got the platypus. Bet you didn’t know that, did you? Even if you don’t start my program, then you’ll have that nugget to bust out at social events*
As a wise and fictional character once said, “With great power comes great responsibility.” What I’ve told cannot be used for evil. You must use it… well, responsibly.

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pulsing stars by Stargate Universe

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The secret of the Platypus and how not to be bored is revealed, only on the Bloggaday.

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For the Piccaday Mass me by the month Me paced out by the day. Like witches at black masses

118 June 12

*An excellent and recommended alternative to my advice

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